When I think about what I want most of all, the word that comes to mind is not ‘freedom’, ‘emancipation’, ‘justice’, or ‘equality’. When I think about what I want most of all, I am not starting from the point of view of a utopian vision for a collective or ‘the way things could be’ and working backwards – not only because I do not consider myself to be a member of any collective – but because my own life is the central reference point for my philosophy in the first place. I am therefore thinking of what I want – and then pursuing a methodology that would be most conducive to my wants. Some people call this stance ‘egoism’, others have problems with that term, but it matters not. I’ll put it another way for you: quite simply, I believe that it makes most sense for a person to figure out the objectives they want to achieve (which are in turn determined by their fundamental principles by means of the most important feedback loop of all) and then select or devise the method that will give them the best shot at reaching their goal.
What I want is happiness, and for me to decide on a course of action(s) that will stand me a chance of achieving it, I must consider several ingredients. What activities will lead to this happiness, what company will I have when performing those activities, and what conditions will I/we be performing under?
Activities. By ‘activities’ I am referring both to existentially-necessary activities – those necessary for survival – as well as all other activities that one might have time for, that give life meaning. Now listen, I’m not making a normative claim here, but for me, merely surviving would not be much of a life at all. I need, as with most animals, entertainment activities. Neither would it be enough for me to have only solo entertainment. Were I on a desert island with no chance of rescue or escape, I would likely go mad – either from the protracted misery of a lifetime alone – or from constantly (like a man holding onto a rising balloon) being torn whether or not to eschew my own life so as to avoid the slower agony of the former. Even if I were surrounded by all of the entertainment material – movies, books, music and games – I could ever want, with no one to play them with I think that sooner or later I would begin to devise a dark plot against my very existence. I seriously, seriously doubt my ability to be happy without other people. Which brings me onto…
Company. While I can find exceptional companionship with dogs or bonobos, I am in this piece referring only to my fellow hominids. I don’t want the seriousness of my expression here to be diminished by jokes about bestiality or teaching a dog to speak English, so let it just suffice to say that an animal’s companionship is never going to be quite enough to make me happy because most of the activities that would give my life meaning require another human being. Not just any human will do either. If one day I found that my desert island had doubled in population but that the new arrival was someone with whom I had nothing in common – not the more important bond of shared values, nor the superficial time-passer of shared interests or hobbies – I would once again find myself unfulfilled, and possibly hatching two dark plots, this time around.
But assuming that I had the company of at least one suitable companion, there would still be no guarantee of happiness, for there is one final consideration to keep in mind…
Conditions. Currently, even if I were to do as Wolfi Landstreicher has seemingly done and surrounded myself with like-minded individuals, if I were still living in the same paradigm (boxed in by millions of vacuous, and more importantly, non-autonomous aliens with whom I have almost literally nothing in common; infringed upon, threatened and stolen from by almost-equally-mindless parasitical and psychopathic scum; and expected to co-exist with both these types of ‘people’ in an environment built entirely along the lines of their irrational and delirious thought, for their continued ends, and with the disgusting infrastructure of concrete, currency and coercion as my environs) then we’re back to the worries about the onset of the dark plot.
Living with people that think the same but within the confines of the incumbent civilisational prison just means I have the best possible company in that prison. But I’d still be in prison, and I’d still do as every prisoner worth his salt would do – form a decent plot – one to either escape or overthrow the guards and level the prison to rubble.
I want to be out of the prison most of all – and part of that prison is represented by awful ideas in people’s minds. We’re all familiar with the concept of bursting bubbles, but it is not so often applied to the others we see around us, and their role in continuing our misery.
So there are but two solutions that remain for me, and one (escape) is not something that would do me well to talk about in a public forum such as this.
Which leaves the levelling of the prison to rubble. Which is where I return to the subject of most of my recent messages – the need to develop an organic, principled corpus of world-weary fellow prisoners and proselytise until we have sufficient manpower to overrun the guards in a single burst. But I will not be part of a gang that does not have a clear idea of the future beyond the time of the guards and their prison, and I will not allow possible traitors to our plan into our midst (I reject the ‘big tent’ mentality).
So if you read this and think you might be suffering from the same rare affliction of being allergic to being pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, debriefed and numbered…meet me behind D block at midnight…
…or, ya know, email me.
I’d rather not have to try escaping on my own. :(